A LIVING EULOGY

© RICHARD BELFORD 

In this life no one is promised tomorrow, and we often leave or are left wishing we had just five more minutes. 

This makes grief one of society’s most misunderstood and profoundly difficult experiences that cannot be resolved by closure alone if there is even such a thing, but by the slow measure of acceptance that only the passage of time and words of comfort can provide. 

I believe my words can provide that comfort and if I were allowed a single thought about grief, and what it has taught me. It would be this.

My sister in-law was diagnosed with glioblastoma in 2018, and I believe that everyone’s life at some point is touched by Cancer.

It was during her struggle to survive that I recall thinking about the senseless suicides of Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade, and as complicated as mental health is I asked myself the following three questions:

Why would two famous, successful, and seemingly healthy people be compelled to take their own lives, when I knew someone who would have done absolutely anything to continue living theirs?

And could a living eulogy telling them how well loved they were and just how much they would be missed have made a difference? And if so, would it have helped them more closely weigh the dreams, joys, struggles, hopes and fears of this life, before taking their own?

The truth is you never really know what a person is going through and those with the biggest smiles can sometimes be struggling the most. Now with that being said perhaps the right words at the right time cannot only lift us, but others.

My sister in-law passed away on March 12th, 2019, but before she did I also wrote a living eulogy entitled: "The Wish" for and about her, and my brother-in-law's life together.

My wish was to have never written it. My hope is that this story's heartfelt message encourages others to tell those they love just how much they are valued while they are still here. Who knows, you may even save a life!

We all eventually lose someone we love, but not all losses are the same, nor do we grieve the same way or at the same pace. Just like every relationship is different, so is every loss, but they can end up sharing two very different and distinct characteristics: gratitude and regret.

It is my belief that a living eulogy can serve to shine a more encouraging light, not on a person's death, but their life by providing a measure of gratitude for what is, and perhaps less regret about what remains.― Richard Lawrence Belford / Inspirational Author

“To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.”

~ Dr. Seuss ~

About the Author

Richard Lawrence Belfordis the father of two daughters and the eldest of three sons who grew up in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada who has been on a twenty-five year creative journey that has allowed him to become well published, and afforded him the privilege of providing faith, comfort and hope to those in grief.

He is the author of "It’s Not Goodbye, It’s See You Later ~ “A Collection of Inspirational Parables” and its 2nd edition ~ “The Best is Yet to Come.” A parable is a symbolic short story that illustrates or teaches some truth, religious principle or moral lesson.

Grief is one of society’s most commonly misunderstood and profoundly difficult experiences that cannot be resolved by closure, if there’s even such a thing, but by a slow measure of acceptance that only the passage of time and words of comfort can provide.

Richard believes his words can provide that comfort and invites you to visit his Author’s Facebook page, follow him on Instagram and X (formerly known as Twitter) and join the increasing number of people his writings have not only inspired to always say; “I’ll see you later instead of goodbye, but also believe the best is yet to come!”

He feels that those who have experienced loss should support one another’s efforts to comfort others and is grateful toThe Centering Corporation andGrief Digest Magazine for theirs.If you would like to learn more about Richard's writing and newest book please visit his website at: www.richardlawrencebelford.ca

"The world goes on without them, for most it goes unchanged. But, for some it will never be the same.”― Richard Lawrence Belford / Inspirational Author