Grief Digest Articles

Gerry R. Cox If the welfare of each person depended upon him or her alone, then life would be a simple matter. But that is not the case. Each individual is part of a community, and the life of each person is interwoven with the lives of others. People want many different things, and in order to satisfy those wants, the members of a community must work together to get them. To satisfy their thirst for knowledge, they build schools. To satisfy their spiritual needs, they built churches and worshi …

Gerry R. CoxUniversity of Wisconsin-La Crosse Conventional wisdom has long suggested that the grief of boys is not as effective as that of girls. My own work for more than forty years suggests otherwise. Girls tend to exhibit more maturity, be more verbal, and more expressive than boys are. It is precisely these characteristics that lead them to being neglected during their grief. Because they are mature, they seem to be managing their grief better. Because they cry, we assume that they are “l …

“Understanding why they're suffering can help, as can talking to others and trying to resolve issues that cause significant emotional pain, such as feeling guilty for a loved one's death.”Support and Bereavement Groups/Mayo ClinicIs it Fear of Abandonment? Is it Depression? Or, is it just another day? Professionals have told me that I have suffered from fears of abandonment since I was eight years old, resulting in chronic depression. Putting a label on your problems may be necessary, but as a p …

For two months, my sister Margaret has been in the hospital, in hospice and now a nursing home.I fly to Cincinnati to visit her August, 2016, and to give my 90 year old brother, Chuck, and his daughter some support. He is her primary caregiver, executor, and power of attorney.The Flight MessengerI have an haunting encounter enroute with a guy who carries a message. An obese black guy arrives after I am seated. As he works his way into the window seat beyond me in the middle, he apologizes saying …

For most of us, grief is uncharted territory. When a loved one dies, we enter into some of life’s most turbulent and troubled waters. It is important to find people and resources who can help us find our way through these rough times.As a grief counselor, I sometimes think of myself as a seasoned river guide. I have accompanied people down this wild-river ride many times before and although every person’s experience is unique, I have picked up a few tips along the way that you may find helpful. …