Grief Digest Articles

You just never get over some grief. You learn to live with it by your side. It changes (thank God) and the intensity diminishes with time, but it never goes away completely. Grief is unique to every person. Some things are universal and considered “normal,” but every personality processes grief differently.As I’ve gone back to read some of the journal entries I wrote in the first months after my husband Tim died, I was surprised at how dark and sad they were. There was a big difference in my wri …

About ten months after my only sister died, I began to feel things other than grief and shock. It was as when a long fever breaks: You feel neither good nor strong but you wake up and have your mind back.I knew then I could to return to my work as a filmmaker with some ability to focus and reason. It was obvious to me before I even began what has now become “the Secret Map of Surviving Loss” what my subject would be: The subject would be grief.Grief, in its many faces, had been the unparalleled …

Time can often be an immeasurable concept in grief. Case in point, our profound loss always seems like it happened yesterday, irrespective of taking place months, years, or even decades before. When my dear son’s precious heart failed after a relatively simple medical procedure, he was taken from this world in what seemed like the snap of a finger. In reality, however, an army sized cadre of skilled doctors, nurses and technicians spent exhaustive amounts of time and effort in trying to revive m …

Throughout my career, while serving as both a pastor and bereavement specialist, I have helped support thousands of families who were mourning precious loved ones. Sadly, the grief dynamic for individuals within most of those families was one of isolation and silence.This silence isn’t surprising. It’s just so, so difficult to talk about death and the pain of grief. Most adults don’t feel comfortable talking with another grownup about death or grief. The thought of trying to speak with and comfo …

Here’s the thing about life. It’s not fair. It never claimed to be and it never will be. Suffering isn’t distributed fairly either. It never is. When you experience a loss or hardship, there is no Cosmic Force that checks your name so you aren’t handed any more. My husband Tim died at 48 from gallbladder cancer just five months after his diagnosis. Clearly, that rocked our world. But this article is about some of the other losses my children and I experienced around that time as well.During the …